Day 21

I'm cured! Just kidding. This 21-day milestone has been interesting, though.

Yesterday's clothes got put away last night, and today I set aside time to get the weekend-buildup taken care of. I gave myself an hour, but it took closer to an hour and a half. This was partly due to my also doing laundry, and to the fact that I cut my hand on my bed (?!?!) when I was shoving a bag under it. I had to take time out to deal with the cut, which was surprisingly bloody, and then I had to watch some Antiques Roadshow with my husband.

But anyway, it was all pretty straightforward and I know I have to just build in the time for the extras, like unpacking after a trip, folding and putting things away after laundry (and cleaning and dressing my wounds after storing luggage). But the really interesting thing was my thought process today.

It was a BEAUTIFUL day, just perfect weather--sunny, cool, breezy--and I was taking the baby to my mom's so she could watch him for the day. We stopped in a little playground where another couple was playing with their little boy. They were talking about the fact that they'd had all these ambitious plans for the day, but ended up in their regular playground right near their apartment, and that was going to be it. And they were perfectly fine with it.

They then mentioned that some friends of theirs were spending the day purging old files and organizing, and while I know how important these things are, and that a holiday weekend is a great time to take care of them, it made me a little sad. Here it was, SO nice out, and they were cooped up inside going through paper.

And then it hit me: I don't want to spend my life cleaning up. Don't get me wrong--I know there will always be things to take care of, and I'm completely still on board with my new-habits project, but I realized just how much of my time and energy and mind-space are consumed by cleaning and organizing. It's like I'm always on, there's always something that needs to get done, I'm never finished. And that means I can never just BE, I can never be present and relaxed like this couple seemed to be, I always have the list of things to get to so my mind's whirring in the background instead of resting.

It's not really just the organizing; it's also running a business, being part of a family, being part of different communities, and all the other things I take on. I need more time-outs. And I'm pretty sure the only way to get them is to eliminate. Choose the things I want most in my life, and eighty-six the rest, or at least put them on the back burner. And this includes stuff. With less stuff, there will be less to dig through, clean up, put away, and worry about. I've known this for a while, but it hit me again today and maybe this will make it easier to release the stuff and embrace my life.